and history repeats

 the fast has ended. close to 2 freaking months of fasting and i chose to end it like that.

fuck.

history repeats. i shunned @ first because it wasn’t good enough. i knew, in time, the product would appreciate in value. and today i see it’s maket price. and i can no longer afford it. sometimes it’s good to invest in things which you think are not worthy of you. because if that person is really that lousy, he can only get better.

 

the view from equinox, nearly divine.

the valentine's day dinner my dear dear cooked for me i was my own dear dear on that day!

yups. tsk tsk.

chap goh mei. eve.

it’s getting more and more fun. the chinese new year celebrations that is. to terence who is still stuck in tekong, cheerios, it will get better soon.

yah the celebrations are really good this year for my family. it’s never been this fun, initimate and heart warming. well, that’s how i feel at least. i feel somewhat more connected and at ease with my cousies… yah i’ve never really been part of their clique when i was much younger, but now, i feel happy sitting around them. haha, i really enjoy their company. wish i could have friends.

cousin's pic!

twist X!

we're not ready yet..

serious

my nephew, yu fei

control

i am feeling irritated. i feel vexed. i sense something on my forhead. i sense an abnormality, i think it’s a pimple threatenting to erupt. Yet, i want to be happy.

Surprises are not meant to be unpleasant. They are meant to make one feel extra happy. An exxageration to the already good circumstances. But what if the circumstances are not all that rosy? Will a surprise make it all good? Will it perhaps change everything around? Will the mood turn merry? Or will it merely serve as an exxageration: making the situaition worse. I apply pimple cream on my forhead and I feel my pores cl0g, and yet I want to be happy.

Yesterday something happened. I ate fried rice at the glutton’s square. I threw pebbles till there were none left to throw. My mind and heart wasn’t in what I was doing. I was really tired, I just wanted to sleep. It didn’t feel right. For once in a long time, I realised what it felt like gto be in control. Circumstances- sometimes allow one to be in control. Yet I want suprises to change things all around. Because I want to be                   

 

happy…

 

HAHAHAHA